End of an Era is approaching

I'm having a bad morning. My ex is going to be out of my house this Friday, Christmas Eve. I should be happy that he is finally leaving but all I can feel is sadness. It's going to be official - we're not together. We haven't been 'together' since October but physically and emotionally it's like we have been. It'll be an end of a era and I'm so scared of how I'm going to deal with it.

I'm a sucker for a horoscope and this one did make me feel somewhat better about the situation...

ARIES

The Lunar Eclipse speaks of release. Something that's been stuck can move on. Something that's been repressed can be set free. Something that's been hidden can come to light. None of this needs to be a problem. Don't think of someone finding and opening a present too early... or of some dreadful secret getting out and spoiling everyone's Christmas... think of discoveries, revelations, inspiring new ways to move on and escapes from tedious situations. A great new idea could yet transform your festive season.
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Gorillaz concert - I now feel musically fulfilled...

I saw Gorillaz last Thursday night and I will say without any doubt that it was the GREATEST concert of my life!! And I have seen a lot of concerts in my 24 years on this earth.

One of the main reasons why I feel so musically fulfilled is because I finally got to experience Damon Albarn singing live. I've been a long long long time fan of Blur (Damon was the lead singer) who were slightly a bit before my time and never got the pleasure of seeing them live. Damon is the co-creator of Gorillaz (see my previous post) so the thought of seeing him live was too good to miss. And i absolutely love Gorillaz so it was a win win situtation.

And boy did they put on a show!! From the 1st minute to the last minute they entertained like I've never seen before. Visually the show was amazing, constant video/stories of all the 4 'cartoon members' of the band on a huge screen. They performed songs from all 3 albums and the playlist was perfect.
There was so much going on on stage, guest performers, big bands with trumpets, violins - everything!! And then there was Damon....well he wasn't voted 4th greatest frontman of all time for nothing!! He was unbelievably mesmerising.

I will upload photos ASAP.
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So the rumours are true...

I heard a rumour around the grapevine that my work (Star City Casino) will be sponsering South Sydney Rabbitohs (my team!) next year....thanks to Daily Telegraph, Russell Crowe and Oprah I can confirm that these rumours are true (check out the Star City logo) So excited! Interested to see if we reap in any benefits as we own a couple of the Corporate boxes at ANZ Stadium and have received free tickets before. Maybe next year I can share a box with Rusty!


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Less is more...

fear less, hope more
eat less, chew more
whine less, breathe more
talk less, say more
hate less, love more
and good things will be yours...
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Absolutely stunning! UK Vogue Astrology shoot












Growing up in the 90's

Just received this email from my brothers girlfriend. Made me feel so nostalgic...the 90's were awesome!


You made worms by squeezing your Vegemite or peanut butter crackers together.


The best parties always had fairy bread.

Blinky Bill, Mr Squiggle, Gumby, SuperTed, Widget The World Watcher and Samurai Pizza Cats.


Going to the Easter Show with a big group of friends from school once you were old enough to go without Mum and Dad.


Doing research for school projects by going to the library or looking up an encyclopaedia rather than using the internet.


Banana Man, Bangers and Mash and The Raggy Dolls.


Game Boy.


Buying those 6 packs of Coco Pops, Fruit Loops, Frosties, Rice Bubbles, Nutri-Grain and Corn Flakes so you could have a different one each day and then opening the packets really carefully and removing the cereal so you'd have a mini wardrobe afterwards You also most probably just let your parents eat the Corn Flakes.

Postman Pat, Fireman Sam and Lift Off (that show with the dirty, eyeless doll named EC).


Birthday parties at McDonald's.


A pinch and a punch for the first day of the month. No returns!

The original Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles.The best show ever made...


Crossing your heart, hoping to die, sticking a needle in your eye.

Don’t push me, push a push pop!


Nobody made "not" jokes... NOT!!


Bathurst stopped being Holden vs. Ford and all those European cars came in until they came to their senses.


Who shot Mr Burns?


Watching Captain Planet and then driving your parents mad by always singing the song.


That's so funny, I forgot to laugh.

You decorated your room with glow-in-the-dark stickers.

Feeling sad when your Tamagotchi died.


Seeing a small rack of DVDs in the video store and wondering if anyone ever rented them.

Getting up early to watch the Rage Top 50.


Friends when they were all actually just friends. Why didn't Phoebe and Joey get together?


Sonic the Hedgehog.

Watching The Simpsons back when it was funny, every night on Channel 10.


Power Rangers becoming cooler than the Ninja Turtles, even though the Turtles will always be cooler.


Watching South Park for the first time and being really excited by all the swearing.

Blowing on the Nintendo cartridge before putting it in the console to make sure it worked properly.


Vulcan, Tower, Flame... Australian Gladiators.

Pokemon! Gotta catch ‘em all!


Full Frontal, not Comedy Inc.

Downloading music from Napster.


Chatting with your buddies on ICQ.


Going to see Titanic.


The winner is… Sydney.


Mighty Max and Polly Pocket. Max and Polly always got lost because they were so bloody small.


Fox Mulder and Dana Scully.

John Eales captained the Wallabies and we won the World Cup.


Zoopa Doopa ice blocks were only 20c and if you couldn’t afford it, you asked the canteen lady to cut it in half so you could split it with a friend.


Listening to boy bands like Human Nature and girl bands like Girlfriend.


Barbie, not Bratz.


The Spice Girls.


Happy Meals were only $2.95 and the toys were simple but actually good.


Person 1: Who farted!?
Person 2: Whoever smelt it, dealt it!
Person 1: Whoever made the rhyme, committed the crime!

Thorpe won lots of gold medals and wasn’t so gay.


Opposite day.

Playing tackle Bull Rush at lunchtime and having tackling banned. You had to resort to grab 1-2-3 or tip. Same goes for footy.


Giving a friend a backage in the canteen line. If it was your best friend, you gave them a frontage.


Pogs and Looney Tunes Tazos.

You laughed at the fat kid on the Cottees cordial ad and changed the song to "My Dad picks his nose..."

You tried Dr. Pepper and hated it.


Service stations didn’t need space for 4 digits on their petrol prices signs.


Girl germs! Boy germs!


Goosebumps.


You had to actually call your friends rather than send them an SMS.


Wearing a Chicago Bulls T-shirt or cap.

Wearing the cap backwards.

Paul Jennings’ Gizmo books.

The feeling of wonder you got, the first time you were able to see the image in one of those Magic Eye 3D pictures.


The Secret World of Alex Mack.


Talk to the hand!


Johnson and Friends, Noddy and Humphrey B. Bear.

Playing truth or dare with your secret crush.

Slap bracelets.


Jurassic Park and those toy dinosaurs where you could pull a piece of the skin out to see its insides.


We had paper money.

Good on ya Mum! Tip Top’s the one!


You could buy more than enough food from the school canteen for only $2.


Begging your parents to go to McDonald’s for dinner.


Rocko’s Modern Life, Rugrats and Hey Arnold!


Noni, Monica and that bald guy named George on Play School.

Watching The Lion King and feeling Simba’s pain when Mufasa died. Disney just doesn’t make them like that anymore.


Soft serve cones were only 30c and they never tried to up-sell a Flake because they didn’t have it.


Wanting a Brain or Silver Bullet during the yo-yo craze.

Troll Dolls.


The Kids' Works at Pizza Hut with unlimited drink refills. You made an ice cream mountain covered in choc chips and marshmallows and could never finish it.


Thomas the Tank Engine


You had to get your photos developed.

Competing with your friends to see who could eat the most sour Warheads in one go.


The Channel 9 logo had dots next to it and the Channel 7 logo wasn’t a folded piece of paper.


No Hat, no play.

High five!


Up high, down low, too slow!


Watching Round the Twist and getting pissed off that the actors kept on changing. You still loved it though.


Cheating in Heads Down, Thumbs Up.


Watching that game show called Vidiot. Game shows didn't have to be educational back then, like That's Academic... that show sucks.


Collecting basketball cards, whether you followed basketball or not.


You always wished your parents had bought you a bigger Super Soaker for Christmas. Christmas is hot in Australia... the more water, the better.

Healthy Harold day was the best because you got to miss class to sit in a tiny caravan and listen to a talking giraffe.


Playing handball with Ace, King, Queen and Dunce and making up stupid rules as you went along.


Skipping ropes and Jump Rope for Heart Day.


Chewing the crappy gum in Bubble-O-Bill's nose and wishing they could just use Hubba Bubba instead.


A*mazing <--- words can not express how much i wanted to go on this show!!!


Hypercolour T-shirts.


Who Dares! Who Dares! Who Dares Wins!


Having your very own Dollarmites account and getting really excited when you earned a tiny bit of interest.


Snake on the Nokia 5110 (Brick!!)
2

After 4 and a half years...I am once again, single.

I've had the worst 2 weeks of my life. Which is the total opposite to the amazing 3 weeks I had overseas.

After 4 and a half years my boyfriend and I have broken up. It was the most worst break up ever. I had been unhappy with the relationship for probably about 2 years but hung in there and did everything I could to make it work while he did absolutely nothing. Nothing at all. It was almost like he was my child, the way I took care of him. I lent him money which I never got back, helped him with a budget that he never kept to, washed his clothes, stuck by him through 2 court cases, drove him around when he lost his licence, made his lunch every day, put up with his gambling problem which has put me in debt, let him move into my bedroom because his lease had run out, paid his bills for him. And what did he ever to for me? Nothing. Absolutely nothing.

I booked this trip to America and Mexico purely for ME. I needed to do something for myself otherwise I was going to lose my mind. "leave him!" people would say but I wasn't strong enough to and I needed him to pay me back the money he borrowed. I wish I was strong enough to have left him because I knew he wouldn't break up with me - I did too much for him to give that up!

In the end, the resentment grew in me, more and more and while I was on contiki I cheated on him with a guy in my tour. I hated myself because cheating is the thing I dispise the most in the world but...and it sounds clique, it made me feel alive!! I hadn't felt like that in over 2 years. It was so good to have someone want me, to be chased, to be taken care of.  

About 2 weeks after I got back, I stupidly didn't log out of my facebook and he read a private msg I had sent to a friend about the other guy. He then admitted that he had cheated on me while I was away with some random chick at a pub. I was gutted. Gutted that he had found out and gutted that he had done the same to me.

Then I got angry. I was the one who was unhappy! I did everything for him! I got nothing from him! I was the one who was used! Why did he cheat??? He had no reason to cheat! He reckons he was unhappy too. A total crock of shit if you ask me! Typical fucking guy. No matter what you do for them, there's still a chance they'll fuck you over.

Obviously the relationship is over.

The worst thing is that he is still living at my house and in the same room. It is really blurring the lines. The 1st week was horrible. Name calling (I believe 'slut' was used), being distant, not knowing how to act with each other. This 2nd week has been much more friendlier but even more confusing. We know we're not together yet still acting like we normally would (without the hello and goodbye kiss). So you can imagine what this is doing to my head and heart!

The worst thing of all is that I am STILL doing everything for him!!! I don't know why but I am. Stupid I know.

I've never been so confused in my life and never thought I'd be in this situation.
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